Sorry I Lied About Going To Lunch

The other day I was at an IRT meeting when a couple of teachers kindly asked me to join them for lunch.

“Oh, I’d love to,” I responded, “but I’m swamped, so I’m going to stay here and have a working lunch.” Only here’s the thing: I didn’t really need a working lunch. What I needed was some good old fashioned introvert time. So I waited a few minutes till the room cleared, then inconspicuously snuck over to Benelux Coffee. Parking was sparse, so I found a spot in Cameron Village, and as I passed by La Carreta, who do I pass by but the group of friendly IRTs that I had lied to half an hour earlier. Frozen, I awkwardly muttered something about having my working lunch at Benelux and moved along. So, allow me to say now what I should’ve said then: I’m sorry I lied about going to lunch.

You see, as an introvert, I need a bit of quiet, reflective time to charge my batteries. There are times, like that day, when that’s a negative. Yet, I like to think, there are other times when that is a positive. Times when I’m able to come up with useful strategies or ideas when I’m in those quiet, reflective spaces. Luckily, I’ve been blessed with family, friends, teachers, coworkers, and bosses who have been able to help me own and improve my weaknesses (humaning) while also being able to help me to maximize my strengths.

I need to remember to do the same for my students.

It’s easy to focus only on the negative aspects of someone’s personality. Particularly when those aspects manifest themselves through behavior. But I have to make an effort to see past that. To help them own their weaknesses while honing their strengths. For instance, when a student struggles with attention-seeking behavior, constantly interrupting and disrupting class, I need to recall that those same attributes, when properly harnessed, can be valuable leadership skills. Or take a student with autism. I once read about a study where people watched a scene in a film and afterwards were quizzed on the details. Those with autism fared less well at recalling the events and emotions related to the people in the scene. Yet, they scored higher on the background elements. The argument was that to those with autism (and this is a gross generalization, but bare with me for the sake of the narrative) the people were just another detail. We spend a lot of time dwelling on how our autistic students might struggle with identifying emotions, but do we equally consider that there might be other details that they brilliantly spot?

I’ve been fortunate enough to have been surrounded by people who have helped me with my weaknesses while still highlighting my strengths. Hopefully I can do the same with my students.

And I’ll go to lunch with you next time. I'm working on it.